Let me begin by saying that Im not a prude nor am I a mamas boy. Ive traveled the world, spent years in athletic locker rooms, served in the military and have been in my fair share of interesting places. Im also not going to present a religious argument or come at this topic from the perspective of academic elitism. That being said, I am going to tell you what I think of the value of possessing a great vocabulary without pulling any punches. Lets get the topic of profanity out of the wayIn this authors humble opinion there is absolutely no value whatsoever in coloring your verbal communications with expletives. As noted above, Ive seen a lot in my life and experience has shown me that the use of profanity typically boils down to an individual being guilty of having one or more of the following flaws: 1. Lack of Intelligence: The English language offers us the choice of so many wonderful adjectives, analogies, abilities to paint word pictures and a variety of other descriptors that there is no need to substitute with expletives. The insertion of a four letter word for emphasis usually only points out the speaker lacks command of his vocabulary. Nothing flashes stupid like the use of profanity. Dont make the mistake of appearing to be uneducated if youre not. 2. Laziness: We have all met bright people who swear. This usually means that they either think that they are smarter than everyone else so people will put up with their use of profanity or that they have just fallen into a rut and are too lazy to work on improving their verbal communication skills. Either scenario is a negative that professionals should not desire to be tagged with. 3. Poor Anger Management: People who are not quick on their feet or do not possess adequate conflict resolution skills often revert to profanity as a safety net of sorts. If all else fails people who fall into this category resort to attempting to intimidate the other party with the use of profanity (see # 4 below). People identified as having anger management issues typically dont reach their full potential without learning better skills. If you would rather spend your career advancing in the ranks as opposed to spending time in counseling or coaching sessions lose the profanity. 4. Insecurity: People that are not confident in themselves and/or their abilities often try and bolster others perception of them by using off-color language as an attempt to feign strength and power. Heres a tipIt doesnt work. Profanity wont intimidate anyone (at least not any worthy opponent) and will likely only lesson your image with the audience you are trying to impress. 5. Socially Inappropriate Behavior: The show off, ego-maniac, substance abuser, the female trying to be one of the boys or the want to be comedian are all examples of socially inappropriate behavior that will often times result in the use of profanity. No body likes a show-off, substance abuse is never a good thing, most guys dont find it attractive to hang out with women who curse like the proverbial drunken sailor and inappropriate jokes are more likely to get you a sexual harassment charge than a laugh Now that weve beaten the profanity issue to death, lets move onI have always said that 90% of the problems in business could be eliminated through the use of direct, clear and concise communication. Being a great communicator is one of the x factors in business. Part of what makes a great communicator is not only possessing a great vocabulary, but knowing how and when to use it. Great orators have commanded the attention and respect of others since the dawn of time. They are rarely ignored or spoken over, but tend to inspire, motivate, educate, influence and lead those around them. If you reflect back on your experience and think of those people whom you hold in high regard, more often than not, they will have been great communicators. Rarely will the people that come to mind fall into the swore like a drunken sailor category. Most of them will however have either possessed great vocabularies or will have completely mastered the use and timing of a more limited vocabulary. While it would be easy to include discussions on focus, clarity, consistency, active listening, brevity, picking your battles and a number of the other traits possessed by good communicators this piece is about vocabulary. Vocabulary is the one of the least costly investments into personal and professional growth that an individual can make. Simply eliminating the you knows and the and ums from your patter can make a big difference in how you are perceived by others. Ask someone whom you can trust to be honest to give you an evaluation of the depth, breadth and appropriateness of use of your vocabulary and then diligently work to correct whatever shortcomings were identified. Youll be glad you did |
